If My Uncle Hadn't Died

If My Uncle Hadn’t Died
By Haven Vice


Life would be so different
If my uncle hadn’t died that day…
Less than two short months after Cedric had his operation…
He was doing so well… more alert and beginning to make new connections.
He was on the mend…
I was back in Catarika just days afterwards…
He looked clearer, even if just a little.
In the eyes of a 7 year old girl,
I could see the change in him.
The only person who was ready to take on the new Cedric was my uncle, his father.
And me, but I was just 7 years old…
Too insignificant to matter in the grand scheme of things…
Less than two months later, we got the call.
My father answered. It was the doctors. My uncle had been in an accident.
I was there in the room. I felt my father’s shock and sadness.
My uncle was gone.
With a sickening feeling, I went to bed that night.
Who would take care of Cedric? What would happen to him?
For weeks I could not eat. They told me not to worry about Cedric. I could not stop.
Just a month after my uncle’s death my aunt decided that Cedric wasn’t cured enough.
She drove to an institution and checked Cedric in.
I became more sick when I found out.
This place was dark. Old. Bad. Not where he belonged, but I was only 7.
Nobody listens to 7 year olds.
My aunt checked him in and left.
She lied about his care.
She told them he had a progressive illness and that he was going to die.
They listened without question.
Oh their uneducated minds!
She returned a month later.
She had forgotten the rest of his things.
She walked out and never again returned.
I called him every day.
My parents did not want to see him but they wanted me to be happy.
My father was no longer happy.
He had lost his brother.
I visited Cedric often and wanted to scream no!
How could you let him live in this void!
How could you take away all he had worked for and let him decay, forgotten!

I began to take the train to see him.
Every day after school I went to visit him.
People asked.
My parents did not support.
I did it because I shared a bond with him.
He was my cousin, and we shared a birthday.
We had a bond like twins.

Had my uncle not died…
Cedric would probably still be alive.
His face would be full of life.
Maybe he would have gotten a job and enjoyed life.
I would not have lost my father.
I would not have lost my mother either.
Or my brother.
A lot of bad things would not have happened…
Had my uncle not died that day.

But he did.

And because of that things are the way they are.
My family left me alone.
I was on my own, trying to bring Cedric to Kiillaana.
I was trying to give him life.
He could not have that inside the walls of the institution where he was held.
Things fell perfectly into place.
I got him home, with me.
We went to Kiillaana together.
But I was too late.
Too late to witness what his new life would be like.
But I was not too late to save him.

Because my uncle died, I found myself.
I went to another country.
I met people who loved me and respected my journey.
People who loved Cedric for who he was.
I met my husband.
These things would not have been possible…
Had my uncle not died that day.
In death there is life.